well its Wednesday night, and its been a pretty good day, still windy and a HINT of chill in the air. the week has been good so far up until yesterday. well i know you probably just curious to know wtf is up. well me and my cousin and the rest of my usher board members went to a after wake at one of our church members homes b/c he lost his father the week before. well before we went down there, my cousin came and got me and we went up to the funeral home that's up the street from me b/c he had to go see someone. now i haven't been inside this place since my grandpa's wake back in '95. so i walked in with him...of course there weren't any bodys in view when you walk in...but theres a big lobby and then the big chapel room where they place the body for the big viewing. i didn't walk in at first b/c well....i get really un easy about stuff like that. so as we were about to leave my cousin asked me did i wanna see the body (b/c he was a former member of our church) and i gave my usual excuses on why i didn't wanna go but he finally got me to walk in and view him and when i did it just felt so......i don't even think theres a word to explain how i felt. he looked so at peace. and it reminded me so much of my grandpa when i saw his body there in the casket way back when.
it just felt so surreal knowing that I'm gonna have to go thru that one day but i guess i kinda took a step to overcoming my fear of death by viewing the body so now i suppose my next step is gonna be to actually attend an funeral.
well as far as today went....i was kinda down b/c well after going thru that yesterday at the funeral home. today while i went and go something to eat i was listening to an mp3 cd i made my mama full of gospel and old school songs and i had the commodores "night shift" on repeat b/c that song hits me in a special place and makes me shed a tear or two errytime i listen to it and well today wasn't any different. i was on my way back home and had it on damn near full blast and just thinking about my grandma and grandpa and aunt and even that person yesterday i couldn't help but shed a few tears over it. i don't know what it is about that song but it just speaks to me in a weird way. to the point where Sunday i think ima go over to the cemetery and visit my passed ones. b/c i haven't been out there since i was at least 8 or 9 AT LEAST
but i don't wanna sadden whoever reads this anymore so in some lighter news. I'm kinda back on my photo shop shit and I've been at it for the past few days so i thought maybe id share a few with y'all. i done came across something called c4d's that really give my sigs nice effects if i use em right so ill let y'all have a gander at em.
oh yeah, just in case you haven't heard that song "night shift" here it is
well...first off happy easter to errybody and they mama. hope it was a good one for yall out there. it was for me. had to usher at church this morning, had a full house too. i guess errybody decided to come to the 11:00 service instead of the earlier two. but it was good tho, did my good sunday deed by helping my cousin help one of the elderly blind members to her car so she could take her home like she does every sunday so i felt good about that. im glad we got out when we did too cuz they clouds had done built up and soon as i got home and walked in the door and turned around to lock the door the rain came pouring down....got in just in the nick of time.
other than that i went to sleep afterwards, got up....ate and hoped on here and came across a few things that really made me raise my eyebrow. well that one thing is "WHY ARE FEMALES SO GOTDAMN CONFUSING?
ima just leave that question wide open cuz i got too much shit i could put in circles around it to help try to explain it.
but anyway other than that its been a good day, i suppose, probably finna get off into some mario kart and my imeem instrumental playlist and vibe for a lil while....peace!
Thursday, March 20, 2008 @ just another random yet so far boring day
so today was just like any other typical thursday, woke up, did what i had to do, came home. noticed i aint really seen the sun at all day then noticed the dark grey clouds overhead and the wind picking up. hmm i guess the weather really knows how im feeling today. a bit iffy, dont know what im gonna do but know i gotta do something.
but anyway, i was texting my gurl this morning. and my last text to her was from around 7:30 this morning before i got ready to head out and i got so busy afterwards that i didnt get to reply back to her until about an hour ago, she "lol'd" and i said i missed her....now usually id get an "aww" but this time i got a "ditto" now maybe im just reading into it too much but it kinda to me feels like a "yeah yeah whatever" but she never did me like that before and i never gave her reason to, so its probably just all on me maybe, i dont know. maybe i am over reacting. hopefully ill hear from her later on today after she gets outta class or ill hit her up first.
but something else has been bothering me too for the past week. and that was how i was gonna pay for my new usher suit at the meeting we had, or i THOUGHT we had tonight at church. turns out the meeting aint until NEXT week thursday so thats a weight off my shoulders for the time being that i aint gotta worry about it so much now. but im still kinda short on funds so i really need me a better paying job forreal. thats the main reason why im going to school this fall so i can rack me up a few degrees and get me something with some nice income and with the connections i got in certain job field in my personal life, i know i can make some big things happen later on down the line.
oh yeah....i finally went on ahead and compiled me a playlist on imeem of all instrumentals for me to vibe to when im B.S'n on here from time to time, hell im listening to it right now matter of fact. i swear music gotta be the one thing that can just zone me the hell out and sooth me when im irratated or annoyed as hell and i thank god for it. cuz other wise id probably be in way worse shape than i am right now.
but anyway....heres some few pics i snapped in the backyard earlier outta boredom and a lil quiet time for myself....enjoy
to be honest....i completely forgot that was today but anyway, it was just really another typical Monday......came home....reapplied to college this fall. oh yeah i didn't even mention. so I've decided to get up off my black ass and go back to school starting this fall for my A.S in computer engineering. now I've been outta the loop for about 4 yrs now and its not that i was scared to go right into college after high school. just that i didn't know how i would cope on the next level since i had a hard enough time tryna get outta high school.
but i shall find out later on this year how ill fair out and I'm actually kinda excited about it b/c I'm finally taking steps to reach my goals i wanna go for later on, like that big ass nice ass house, that car i always wanted, living more comfortably, etc etc. but yeah...i was gonna start this summer which is actually in may when classes start but i decided to push it back to this fall so i can get myself prepared for it.
gotta take a placement test, gotta get my financial aid done and filed, gotta pay all my fees and just make shoI'mstr8 when classes do start so i can focus on my school work.
other than that its been pretty pleasant down here the past few days....hot as hell but nice. a lil nice breeze today, hopefully it'll remain the same for the rest of this week i hope, and i hope i get my new damn camera sometime this week too so i can go snap a few pics of it and share with y'all or i might just use the one i got now.
so for the past few days i really haven't spoken to my new "thang" I'm talking to. id text her every now and then and get a text back, hit her back and wouldn't get a reply until like the next day. haven't spoken to her on the phone either. so yesterday morning she hits me up saying she was going thru something which is why i really haven't heard from her. now I'm thinking to myself "whew....OK, so it isn't me lol" but i wanted to call her to see how she was doing and make sho she was OK. but i kept thinking "what if this and what if that" which held me back from doing it. so we finally speak today and she tells me that she was hoping i would have called her the other day since she didn't text or call me at all, just to see how she was doing.
if i ain't wanna kick myself in the ass after hearing her tell me that, i apologized of course and told her why i didn't do it. shes cool with it and at least i know now for future reference what to do lol. but we're back good now, I'm still her "tre-day" and shes still my "honey bee" lol.
other than that. Ive been doing alotta thinking about myself and the future and it mostly has to do with the new season of college hill on BET and the house that they got em staying in....which is in Atlanta and is fucking NICE!. like some shit you saw on "diary of a mad black woman" which was TylerPerry's actual house btwlol. but seeing that shit made me think about what i wanna have for myself one day. to be able to live comfortably. weather it be down here in Miami or if i move away. kinda gave me something to strive for in the future, god willing i make it there. but ima try my hardest to get to it tho b/c that'll be fuckin NICE lol.
well, that's pretty much it for today...so stay tuned and see what else is next.
OK so i know i done missed out on like two days worth of blogs but to be honest...nothing really exciting really happened. uhhh lets see.....i made two copies of a mix CD for my ex and made her a copy of rick ross's trilla album. and in turn for payment she got me a 50 pack of blank Cd's. now of course money would of been a great form of payment....maybe even some head, but dealing with a computer and a shitload of music on it, you gonna need a blank CD here and there.
other than that..hmm....i did apply for the summer term at Miami-Dade college. i think I'm finally ready to hop back into the loop after being outta it since i got outta high school. i really don't know what i wanna take up but i know its gonna be something with computers but after talking to a good friend of mines....it seems that its gonna deal with alot of math too, which ain't one of my more stronger areas. but then again...ima have to take math courses anyway since this gonna be my first time. guess ill just stick thru with it b/c in this day and time and ESPECIALLY down here, you cant get too far in the world without a degree of some kind....beyond a high school diploma. so we gonna see how this plays out for me
oh yeah...i finally got into something called "emulators" which are basically consoles for the computer that you can play old ass games on. for example i got a Nintendo 64 one and I've been playing Mario kart 64 for the past 3 days until at least 5 in the am lol. i forgot just how fun this game is and now I'm back hooked on it.
hmm what else. oh yeah. well i am now talking to a sexy young thing by the name of "bee". she resides in DC and only about an hour away from where my folks stay in MD. i swear this girl is silly as hell which is what i love about her, smart, got a good head on her shoulders and knows what she wants outta life. ain't too many out there like her so ima try and hold on to her for as long as i can and see what happens.
but yeah....that pretty much it for the past few days.....stay tuned for tomorrows issue i guess lol
sooo...woke up this morning all out of tune due to the time going up an hour last night. almost fell asleep in the shower it got so bad. went to church this morning to hear the good word and to be honest i wonder if i even did hear any of it lol, i was good for about the first hour but once they turned the ac up a lil bit i was trying my hardest to stay up....felt my eye lids getting heavy as HELL the whole time....like i couldn't WAIT for it to be over with. but of course i did pay attention to what the pastor was preaching and i will take heed to it as well.
other than that, i got out....went home....then went and got me a lil chicken club salad from Miami subs and a frosty from Wendy's to wash it down with which is what i just completed before starting this blog up lol.
and since I'm still somewhat tired from the party last night and church this morning i think ima go on ahead and cut this short and hit the bed and find something on tv to fall asleep to....so ILL HOLLUH!!!!!
Saturday, March 8, 2008 @ And today was an even better day
so well really the only highlight of today was my aunts retirement/bday party over at signature gardens. real cool laid back event, whole bunch of church folk from where she retired from and of course the family was there also. folks went up and said a few words of encouragement to her including myself. my cousin (one of her daughters) put together a lil power point show for her to show her how much we care and love her. real special sentimental event. of course we got down at the end lol, well my lil cousins and em got down...i just watched and snapped a shitload of pics.
and after sitting there watching all the goings on of the party and presentations from her kids and errything.....it got me to thinking that...that's something i wanna do for my mama when she retires lord-willing. have all her close co workers and friends and of course the family to come out for her big day....maybe do it like two in one too (bday party and retirement party) but that's a long ways away from now so i got plenty of time to think about it some more.
but like i said...that's really the only excitement i had today....stick around tomorrow and we'll see what else i got to say....
so yeah the title speaks for itself. woke up this morning...went to work, got off, rode my my usual barber to see if he was in....he wasn't so i rode around the corner to this other spot. i guess it was a Jamaican barbershop cuz that's all that was up in there lol. soon as i walked in this dude took me...i swear i couldn't understand a WORD he said but he damn sho got me looking right in about 10 minutes lol.
oh yeah..i found out yesterday that my mama wanna fly up to maryland to visit my cousin and her kids since they not coming down here for spring break at the end of the month. now i wouldnt mind going and all, not that im scared of flying...even though i havent done it since '99 when i flew to chicago. but only thing i hate is my damn ears popping. now ive heard of swallowing ya spit, yawing, chewing gum drinking sodas, all of that to keep it down but if it was a sure way of stopping it completely without and side effects or after effects then id be all for going.
but then again i do need a damn vaction outta miami and plus id be damn close to this gurl im talking to if i were to go up there too....actually id be close to a few peoples i know up there lol. hell i might as well man up and go...as long as i dont get off the plane with my damn ear drums bleeding then we good lol
other than that...i pretty much been up in the crib just chillin...LITERALLY b/c its so got damn hot outside. but they said its a cold front headed our way with some severe weather in front of it so maybe it'll cool us down a lil come tomorrow.
oh yeah finally i downloaded rick ross's new album last night "Trilla" and by far its the best album Ive heard this year. DEF. tops "port of Miami" in my opinion. my jam on there right now is "all i have in this world" with mannie fresh but it was called "Japanese denim" before that. few other joints I'm feeling are "mayback music, luxury tax, and I'm reppin my city. so if you do get a chance, download that joint, or buy it when it drops....you wont be disappointed.
Thursday, March 6, 2008 @ just some random thoughts
so yeah....like i was up around 6 this morning harassing murr and i noticed i heard police sierns going by the house. didnt think anything of it until i walked out into the living room and saw the car lights flashing lighting up the living room. peaked out the window just to see what was going on...just a routine speeder pulled over. 10 minutes passed and they were gone.....back talking to murr again....she went to bed, so i laid down too even tho i had to be up like 3 hrs later....but once again i hear sirens again.....police got another speeder in front of the house....same thing...went back to lay down.....and for a THIRD time i hear these siernes and yes you guessed it, yet ANOTHER speeder caught....so im looking like damn.....they might as well put a stoplight on this three way intersection if they ever wanna stop these damn speeders. even tho the speed limit is 35..i think....i know i always pull at least 60....and aint been caught....yet lol
but in other news....i finally found this insturmental song i aint heard since middle school....called " Esa Morena" by dj laz...its like a fast paced latin/spanish instrumental we used to dance to back in middle school, ill probably post it up for yall to hear. i never got so damn amped at 5 in the morning off a damn song before like i did this but this shit brought back some memories.
but yeah....other than that...it was a good dy, think ima go grab some grub right now...tacobell aint sounding so bad and i got a strong hankering for some apple turnovers from mcdonalds too.
so..first of...shout out to my lil sis jocey for putting me up on this here...i can finally get some shit off my chest.
but anyway...so after a lil heartache from last night...due to a recent break up. i was kinda going thru it...all up on songs that constantly reminded me of her and i. tryna hold back tears erry few minutes. guess you can say down right depressed. but thankfully for the group of people i keep around me, i seem to be moving on from it and realizing it ain't worth all of that focusing on something that's outta my hands now anyway. cant do nothing but forgive and keep it moving which is what I'm doing. think i might of found something new myself anyway......ill keep ya posted on it
What can i say? 22, negro, FL bored and raised, part time photographer, part time
graphic designer....well used to be, part time drunk, full time UPS clerk, and a whole bunch of other boring
stuff you probably don't wanna read, or might already know
